Formerly Homeless

2007-03-11T08:09:00.000-07:00

Apparently, a young fellow by the name of Steve Wood spent a week living on the streets of Philadelphia, to get a greater understanding of street life for an upcoming article he is writing for his school paper. After spending a week, Steve said he became disappointed with the homeless, because they have a "sense of entitlement," and they have expectations for the City to take care of them.

I suppose it is good that he is trying to understand. It is good that anybody is trying to get a grasp of the reality of street life. I suppose I can overlook his ignorance when he says he "lost patience" with the street folks, who in his opinion "make their own bed."

Of course Mr Wood feels that they make their own reality. He certainly makes his own reality, choosing to dip in and out of homelessness on a whim. Unfortunately, he is not factoring in the sheer amount of abuse that homeless people experience, most of them from a very early age.

Steve, let me tell you what happens when you get physically, mentally, or sexually abused from a young age. Because you are so small when it first happens, you learn to cope with abuse from a powerless position. You come to understand on an instinctual level that when people hurt you, you can't do anything about it. By the time you reach adulthood, you're left with a screwed up sense of what "choice" means, and a bitter view on the topic of justice. Because you've been lied to over and over again, you cannot trust others, and thus you cannot trust yourself. You fear becoming an abuser, so you begin a slow form of suicide to prevent yourself from harming others.

That's just one tiny piece of the puzzle. Now let me add another piece. Imagine yourself lying at the bottom of a cliff after having fallen. You are in such excruciating pain that you dare not move. A fellow comes along and says "I'm a first responder, I'm going to get you some help!" The guy takes off running. Several hours later, you are still waiting, unable to move. Another person comes along, gives you a drink of water, and says "Help is coming soon!" That person leaves. Several hours pass. It is getting dark. Tell me you wouldn't have some anticipation of help at this point. What on earth could be taking them so long? Don't they understand how much pain you're in?

Steve, people get dissapointed when Cities, Governments, Churches, or other "helpers" don't live up to their expectations-- it's human nature. Apparently, even the homeless don't live up to some people's expectations. I suppose you wanted them all to be weeping in gratitude over the bowl of soup they received at the soup kitchen, but reality has betrayed you. A lot of homeless have been in crisis for years and years, and they are sick of governments declaring new programs and strategies for assistance only to be left out in the cold.

Yet, I will forgive your resentment. I know from experience that street life makes you cranky. You were resentful towards people who were enjoying their coffees... that's pretty irrational. Those coffee drinkers did nothing to you, why would you be resentful, unless you were simply suffering, and needed a place to project that frustration? You may have also dumped some of your frustration on homeless. Hopefully, once you have a nice warm shower and sit down at the computer, you will be in a clear enough head to see that these people have been through enough, and probably don't need another negative opinion.

Victoria Homeless Needs Survey Counts 1,115

2007-03-03T10:41:00.000-08:00

Victoria Cool Aid Society - News Release - March 2, 2007 - The Homeless Needs Survey, which was held from February 5-9, has identified 1,115 persons in the Capital Region who were homeless or unstably housed.
An enumeration was conducted though a count in facilities which provide shelter to people who are homeless on Monday, February 5. The survey was conducted throughout the Capital Region from February 6-9, 2007, with questionnaires about housing needs completed by persons who were homeless or living in unstable housing. The questionnaire was conducted by over 200 volunteers indoors at over 40 social service provider locations and outdoors using the Salvation Army’s Beacon Bus.
“The Homeless Needs Survey will provide detailed and helpful information to over 60 participating service providers in the Capital Region,” said Kathy Stinson, the Executive Director of Cool Aid. “As well, the full research results will be shared with all levels of government and other community partners to help us better meet the needs of individuals and families who are inadequately housed in Greater Victoria.”
“The purpose of the survey was to gain a deeper understanding of what people who are homeless or unstably housed feel they need to find and maintain housing,” said Researcher Jane Worton of the Community Council. “We are grateful to the 815 people who completed questionnaires. They have shared personal information with us in order to help us provide better supports for the thousands of inadequately housed people in our community. We now have a wealth of good data to build action upon.”
“According to 2001 census data, 22,205 households in the Victoria Census Metropolitan Area were inadequately housed,” said Jane Worton. “We were able to interview 372 individuals in this situation – and this will provide the most detailed data ever about this large group in our communities.”
Making up just 2.8% of the local population, Aboriginal people, including First Nations, Metis, Inuit and Native, comprised 25% of those interviewed.
Only 11% of those interviewed were from outside BC, with the vast majority being from the Capital Regional District (73%) and elsewhere in BC (16%), often as close as Duncan and Vancouver.
The Homeless Needs Survey found people were homeless or unstably housed in all parts of the Capital Region. Although just a sample of the total number of people who are inadequately housed, the geographic distribution of interviewed individuals follows:
73% in the four core municipalities including –
• 496 people from Victoria (61%)• 48 people from Saanich (6%)• 24 people from Esquimalt (3%)• 6 people from Oak Bay (1%)• 22 people from an unspecified core municipality (3%)
4% in the Western Communities (33 people)
3% on the Saanich Peninsula (22 people)
4% on Salt Spring Island (32 people)
16% did not provide their municipality (132 people)
Rural and outlying communities were particularly under-represented due to the few number of survey locations and because social service providers in more sparsely populated regions often do not see their clients as frequently as those in the more urban areas.
Homeless counts frequently note underreporting of families who are homeless. The information from the Homeless Needs Survey will be complemented by the rich information gathered through the Burnside Gorge Community Association’s recent Homeless Families Outreach Project, using interviews with 432 families who were homeless or at risk of becoming homeless.
A more detailed demographics report is enclosed. The full research report for the Homeless Needs Survey will be released in late March or April after a full analysis can be completed.

Hey Hey, Ho Ho, blah-blah-blah has got to go!

2007-02-24T11:54:00.000-08:00

Perhaps we are too intellectually overwhelmed with poverty and homelessness. It’s the only explanation I have left to offer when I consider the disparity between need and funding for homeless services. I don’t believe in maliciousness, and I think I’ve said that before. Even the tighty-righties that would like to enlist all street people in the military or develop some new form of slavery really have the best, if not foolish, intentions in mind. More liberal (if that word hasn’t been wrecked already) counterparts still espouse the same classic strategies and values: research, protest, research, lobby, research, suck-up-to-the-media, blah blah.

What these two political groups seem to have in common these days is a lack of action. Let me give you an example. In a recent budget for British Columbia, $27 million was earmarked to “help keep 300 emergency shelter beds open all year-round.” A fund of $38 million was also included to finance supportive housing projects, including 600 shelter beds, transitional housing and permanent housing. Sounds nice doesn’t it? 27 million… 38 million… except for the fact that in Victoria BC alone, we may have well over 1000 homeless people, and only few hundred shelter beds to assist them. This budget money would be enough to partially address the issue in Victoria, but the figures given are to cover the entire province!

So what’s going on? A 2004 report by the CBC finds:
“The combined service and shelter costs of the homeless people ranged from $30,000 to $40,000 on average per person for one year (including the cost of staying in a homeless shelter). In contrast, the combined costs of service and housing for housed individuals ranged from $22,000 to $28,000 per person per year, assuming they stayed in supportive housing.”
(http://www.cbc.ca/fifth/main_nowayhome_cost.html)

It seems really simple when you look at these figures. Build enough supportive housing, and save millions of dollars. It would work for the fiscally-prudent (ha ha) conservatives, and it would work for the image-conscious liberals. Considering the fact that we’ve had this information for the last 4 years, one has to ask: what are the funders waiting for? Homelessness is a big media issue right now, so shouldn’t the politicians be lining up for photo-ops with token homeless people, and cutting ribbons to open massive supportive housing projects?
I guess it gets down to intellectual debate, because we have all seen or experienced the ghettoization of large housing projects built decades ago, and nobody wants to create another Regent Park. http://www.thestar.com/Unassigned/article/177861 Not being an engineer, I’m guessing that people sit around tables and try to come up with housing designs that everyone will agree on with little success. Who knows? I imagine that administrative delays are eating up 30% of the time allotted to solutions development, and insurance companies and legal firms are bogging things down. Every now and then, some new academic research comes along and undermines or contradicts the previous research (as researchers are taught to do).
It makes me think that the general public needs a still firmer resolve on the matter. Not that I want to see another police-escorted and carefully organized rally event (hey hey, ho ho, blah-blah-blah has got to go!), but perhaps we need a bit of inspiration…

Staff Consistancy

2007-01-14T08:27:00.001-08:00

When you work with people in crisis, they ask for everything at once, and get upset in the blink of an eye if you don't provide it. These days in Victoria, it's hard not to upset at least a few street folks a day, because the place I work at (the needle exchange) has limited resources. Sometime we have food, and sometimes we don't. Sometimes we have blankets, and sometimes we don't.

And people don't believe you when you say that there is nothing to eat because no donations came in today. They think that you have some secret stash of food in the back office that you are not sharing because you are too lazy to go and get it. Alas, the negative effect of lazy or otherwise incompetent workers in this field. I have worked beside people who will lie to homeless people to avoid having to go into the back room to pull out a warm jacket, or will lie simply because they don't know how to say no.

There are also many workers who don't know how to get resources, or are overwhelmed--who simply cannot process all the requests. I have tried to be the person who goes "the extra mile" with clients, and I haven't always lived up to my own standards.

I won't be too hard on other workers here, because we all have our moments of weakness, but it sure is frustrating to deal with people who have been lied to and don't trust you simply because you're on the opposite side of the counter. It would be nice if all social workers were equal in their approach; if we could somehow "clone" the perfect social worker.

There is the other side as well: there are workers who will do so much for the clients that all other workers seem to pale in comparison. This is the person who gives cash or rides to people, who has more access to resources, and gives them freely, sometimes breaking the rules to do so. I have found myself being this person at times, but I have learned through experience that this behaviour creates a good cop/bad cop scenario, and so I have moderated my approach to be more in line with the general ideas of the team.

The answer to all of this inconsistancy is of course effective communication (hmmm... it seems that the answer for a lot of things is communication). I have worked in about 10 different agencies that deal with homelessness and addiction, and I notice that the more successful ones (i.e. the ones that see the best client relationships) are the agencies that communicate often, and communicate effectively.

Antimisinformationism

2006-11-04T09:13:00.000-08:00

What is happening out there on the street? Do those of us who sit on various commitees and work in social agencies actually know what is happening out there with the homeless and addicted? I have sat in focus groups where one person said something, and that one statement somehow became an accepted fact at the committee level. One guy at a focus group says "We are tired of people talking to us," and the report for the focus group says "They are tired of people talking to them." The committee then makes a motion to "talk to people less," and the misinformation continues. The newspaper then reports that the committee says people should be talked to less, and the local politicians, wanting to have an "ear to the ground" then use the misinformation to create "non-talking" policies. And this says nothing about the contorting of the message that happens as it gets passed through different people. I'm convinced that very few people in this country have an idea of what is happening in the sub cultures that surround them.

Yet we, in our ignorance, are still forced to take actions on a regular basis. Such is life: we never know what the future may hold, but we are forced to act as though we do. To combat this difficult situation, our society has come to rely on the scientific method to give us a "reasonable" view of reality. If enough academic reports point in a certain direction, we can make enough assumptions to proceed. For the homeless, we apply social science, a smattering of sociology, social work, psychology, cultural geography, anthropology and economics. Ethical guidelines are developed, and legions of volunteers and academics rush out to get the scoop on street life.

Science has a difficult time with humans, however. For example, how do you prove what percentage of homeless people suffer from some form of mental illness? You could try and get a sample population and survey them, but the crisis situation that most are currently in will cause certain traits which may appear to be mental illness. Furthermore, how do you get this sample? Do you invite homeless people to volunteer (which will only gather certain types of people) or do you force people to participate (and if so, how?).

Perhaps the whole idea of "studying the homeless" should be discarded in favour of a more humane approach. I suggest we give what is needed while gathering what information we can in the process. For example, a reasonable homeless count can be done by tallying all of the people who use social helping agencies in a given area (so long as the list of agencies is very wide ranging and complete). Accurate records of client situations can be recorded by staff of foodbanks, soup kitchens, and emergency shelters. There is currently no national database or method for doing this, but I think it is time to initiate one. And when I say a national information database, I don't mean that we should bombard the homeless with technical questions, I simply mean we can ask them a few open-ended questions occasionally, and the staff person asking can interpret and record the results anonymously. For example, most people who come into emergency shelters tell their story to the staff member who does their intake. The staff can, after finishing the intake, visit an online database and fill out a basic form.
This data would accumulate, and eventually would give a somewhat accurate picture of what is happening.

Nevertheless, any attempt to get a glimpse into a sub-culture will produce a limited result, and we should keep this in mind. For this reason any study or data collection carried out with homeless people be done in conjunction with the handing out of tangible resources like food, shelter, etc. We cannot ensure an accurate reflection of reality, but at least we can make sure our time, and the time of clients, is not completely wasted.

My Story 5: Meeting Dad

2006-11-04T09:08:00.000-08:00

When I was 12, my mother told me that my sister and I had different fathers, and he wanted me to visit him for a week in Prince Rupert BC. I thought it was a neat little trip. I took an airplane for the first time in my life, and spent a week having fun with this somewhat quiet guy and his wife May. He took me up the mountain on a gondola, swimming in the local pool, and he even let me push the gas pedal as he drove around town. I returned to Vancouver after a week and my mother said I would be going to live with him permanently. She figured, probably correctly, that he could offer me a better life than she could.
So I moved to Prince Rupert, and became a part of my Dad's working-class life. There were just the three of us, and it started out great. I stopped drugs and crime, and became a pretty normal 12 year old, playing guitar and hanging out in video arcades when I wasn't at the little lake down the street with the other kids in my neighborhood. There was a huge leap in my grades at school, and I realized for the first time in my life that I was good at this "school stuff." I also took on my first helping role. There was a young kid at my school with an acute form of epilepsy that needed someone to walk him home each day. I was eager to volunteer, and I was his helper for about a year, until we moved to another side of town.

Filming Homeless

2006-10-28T10:34:00.000-07:00

I guess a few street people attacked a camera man while he was filming them getting busted by the police the other day. Recently, our little town has been discussing homelessness and downtown drug use like crazy, but this new development should turn up the volume a notch. I can just see the letters to the editor that will trickle in over the next week or so, which will no doubt complain about the "culture of privilage" amongst drug users and homeless. Such violent acts, though provoked, can become symbolic of what's going on out there. Unfortunately, symbols are also gross over-generalizations, and the public just doesn't have the time to sift through the data to find out whether or not street people are violent by nature.

They are not naturally violent, in case you are wondering. Even the most hard core cocaine addict on a bad run is highly unlikely to attack. In fact, the most violent drug is alcohol, not crack, cocaine, heroin, or crystal meth, and alcohol is not used exclusively by homeless folks.

The attack does highlight the sensitive issue of filming or taking pictures of homeless people. We are a culture of documentation-- if there is an issue, we want to record it, film it, preserve it, and have at least one reality TV show about it. That gets really tricky with street people because the culture of the street says "no questions, no pictures, and certainly no bloody films about my life please." It makes sense doesn't it? These are people at the lowest point in their life. They don't want these images to be burned into their consciousness, or anybody else's consciousness. Cameras have a way of freezing people forever, and if I was going to be frozen in time, I would certainly not want to be remembered as a homeless drug user. When people are at their worst, the camera is a weapon of mass destruction.

Now the camera man might have been a bit surprised when the homeless people approached him demanding the tape. His culture tells him that the "truth" must be told, and he believes he is helping people by documenting their struggles. Perhaps the story was going to be about how difficult street life is, or a glimpse into police behaviour with the homeless. He may not see exactly what message he is sending these folks by filming them without asking. While most of us in Canadian society would be indifferent or even excited by the idea of being on the six o' clock news, these folks were not.

Cultural values are clashing between street and non-street people all the time, and it seems as though the gap is getting wider. So why is it happening, and what can we do to reduce the conflict?

These things happen because we humans are not educated about each other. If the street folks knew that the reporter had their interests in mind, or at least that his intentions were not malignant they may have been fine with the shots. If the reporter had any idea that the people he shot would be so offended, he might have reconsidered the filming. The camera man does have more access to educational materials, and more experience in dealing with humans in front of his camera, so one would expect his sensitivity. On the other hand, everybody including street people knows that violence is a horrible option which solves nothing and creates problems for everybody on both sides, so I see fault in both parties here.

I am going to make another gross generalization here, but I think it will help: street people need to be informed about who can be trusted. I don't think the press is particularily damaging to the homeless for example (another generalization) and as such, each news story that is done should be understood for what it is. Too often, reporters are seen as part of "the system," and are not trusted. Consequently, the true story of homelessness is not reaching the mainstream population with the full force that it could be. Politicians, social workers, businessmen, and other professionals all have tools for dealing with the media, and homeless people need those tools just as much, or perhaps more. Each reporter comes with a unique challenge, and street people need to know about their rights and the impact of their dealings with the media.

I will add that the press needs to be informed about street culture, which is perhaps not taken serious as a culture because of its internal diversity. Because people are homeless for so many different reasons, it is hard to quantify cultural norms of street people much less learn about them. Still, there are some basic lessons to be learned, such as how to use a camera without getting punched. I think explaining the purpose of the shoot, and clearly spelling out what happens with the film might help, for example.

Essentially, I believe conflict like this can be avoided with a bit of understanding on both sides. I hope that this incident has not tarnished anyone's view of the homeless, because like airplane passengers, there are always a few that do not handle the stress of life very well.

Bandaids

2006-10-15T14:15:00.000-07:00

Boy, what a tricky situation Victoria has gotten into. There are not enough emergency beds for the homeless here, and the street population is growing steadily. While 40 new shelter beds will be added soon, and 50 permanent housing arrangements are in the works, these simply will not address the sheer number of homeless that huddle in doorways, or set up tents in park bushes. As we face a cold and wet winter, we have some tough choices to make as a city. I have heard the line that we can’t “warehouse” people by setting up massive dormitories where people sleep on the floor, but the reality of an increasing street population is making this band-aid solution more and more attractive. A 6 week temporary shelter for 40 people at a local church basement was opened, and within 3 weeks, that shelter was turning away 27 people. Furthermore, I know from my work with people at the needle exchange that a large portion of the homeless would not even go near the shelter, so the homeless problem is far beyond even the most conservative estimates.

While it is true that we cannot put our all of our resources into temporary solutions, we also cannot dismiss the immediate needs of homeless. The Toronto “Streets to Homes” initiative was developed to take drastic steps to reducing homelessness in the city. One of the strategies employed by the city was to limit or move away from the distribution of sleeping bags, blankets, and other essential gear, because the overall goal was to house people, not to enable them to sleep on the street. Agencies were permitted to distribute sleeping bags, but only after pursuing all other shelter options.

While this sounds great on paper, unless an immediate option for the sleeping bag recipient is provided, the risk of death from exposure is much higher. One writer called this particular idea the “Streets to Graves” approach.

While it seems from a surface investigation that nobody was denied a sleeping bag in Toronto, it does concern me that people are considering the removal of basic supports as a viable part of dealing with homelessness. Of course those basic supports should not be necessary in an ideal world, but if even one person dies as a result of some administrative rule made in a cozy boardroom, then the whole plan is flawed on an ethical level.

Caution is the approach that I am suggesting here. Perhaps there is a growing frustration with what appears to be a growing problem, and some are suggesting that the agency supports currently in place are enabling rather than helping. While I think the help on the ground needs to be complemented by permanent solutions and long range strategies, the grave situation that we face dictates that we cannot afford to lose any supports whatsoever. We must remember that even the slightest change in policy can have catastrophic effects on the extremely vulnerable members of our population, and act with due sensitivity. I know first hand what it’s like to sleep absolutely rough with no blankets, and believe me, it’s more about survival than sleep. I remember sitting on the side of the highway one autumn night. My friend and I were hitchhiking between London and Toronto Ontario, and it started snowing unexpectedly. We could not get a ride, and having nothing on but jean jackets, light clothes, and running shoes, we hit the ditch and built a small fire. We fell asleep more than a few times in those 6 or so hours, and luckily, one of us woke up each time and stoked the fire. If I had died there, what a waste it would have been. Basic support programs prevent tragedies, plain and simple. Despite our desires for longer-term solutions we must not forget the harsh reality that many people face. Bandaids might not cure the complete illness, but we have to stop the bleeding somehow...

Harm Reduction on Crack!

2006-10-14T09:22:00.000-07:00

I'm sure there is a bunch of literature out there claiming that safe injection sites and other harm reduction strategies are the more acceptable way to deal with addiction issues. I just want to summarize the topic for those who may have just joined the discussion (hmmm, where have you been??), and to lend support to the most progressive ideas of our time.

There is a lot of talk in Victoria about opening a safe injection site similar to "Insite" in Vancouver. There are a lot of good reasons for opening such a site that go beyond harm reduction. Insite has thus far shown itself to be a community contributor, as well as a life saver for addicts.

The program I am suggesting goes several steps further. I think we need a "campus" of addiction care that provides safe injection/consumption areas, a drop-in center with an outdoor courtyard, a shelter/housing area with a meal plan, and team of health care and community care workers. This campus would prescribe clean and regulated cocaine and heroin through an onsite doctor, and develop a drug management plan with each user. Abstinence would be encouraged and supported, but not forced. The program would be covered under the health care system... free to drug users. It would be a long term situation for some, and a temporary solution for others. This campus would have strong ties to detox and drug rehab centers, as well as to other community supports.

Following are the top ten reasons why an addiction treatment campus would be better for our communities:

1) So much mental, emotional, and physical energy of drug users is spent on getting drugs. This energy can be spent on developing or using community supports, but so often, the addict is merely trying to get high. With prescribed heroin or cocaine, the addict can focus energy on personal growth instead.

2) I don't need to refer to stats to explain the relationship between drugs and crime. If hard drugs were available through the health care system, the community would see less violent and non-violent crime. There would be less victims, less cost to police departments, and more money to be spent on the health and well being of all citizens.

3) A "campus" model of addiction care would dramatically reduce health care costs. Because housing, medical care, and community supports would be included in the package, costs to other local shelters, emergency wards, and community services would be reduced. Many addicts tap into the current health care system on a regular basis, which cost tens of thousands per year per addict.

4) City streets, alleyways, and parking lots have become "uglified" with gates, fences, and physical deterrents to drug users. These security features would not be needed as much if society provided a safe place to use. Local restaurants would not have to worry about shooting up when they provide access to their washrooms.

5) Safe injection=safe disposal. If addicts have a safe place to use, hang out, and are not worried about being caught with syringes, those syringes will not end up in parks, crammed down toilets, or in some other place where an innocent person will get stuck.

6) So much mental and physical damage results from street drugs being "cut" with some cheaper substance. A lot of deaths occur when crystalized methodone gets mixed with heroin, for example. A prescribed heroin or cocaine program would ensure that the dosage would be regulated and safe.

7) If these drugs were prescribed, then the government of Canada would be the "dealer," and it is unlikely that the government will "push" drugs on young people, as current street dealers do. Street dealing would be greatly minimized, as it is really hard to compete with a "free" price.

8) Because of the housing and "drop in" nature of the program I am suggesting, there would be less of a gathering of drug users on streets where people do not want them. Many businesses are getting more and more frustrated with drug users on their doorsteps. Creating a safe place for drug users would help alleviate the tension in downtown areas.

9) Drug users would have a chance to interact with health care professionals and addiction specialists while picking up their daily dosage. This means that users will have opportunites for referrals, emotional support, or withdrawal management on a regular basis-- something not as likely to happen when you visit your drug dealer.

10) The spread of HIV and Hepatitis would be reduced, along with other serious drug-related illnesses.

These are some of the reasons. I want to stress that this kind of program is only compassionate if abstinence is encouraged, and I also want to stress that HOW the program is run will make all the difference. Progressive, present, and dynamic staff will be required, and the connections with other community services (Police, Health Authorities, etc) must be solid. It could be run as a study, but there is enough evidence to justify a permanent program already. Furthermore, the cost savings to the health care and the criminal justice system are tangible and immediately recoverable.

This is not a "giving up," or a "giving in," this is the next progressive step in a battle with a medical condition that affects every inch of Canadian Society. I will say it once again, for those who missed it: Until we treat addiction as an illness, we will have no progress.

Derek Book

My Story 4: Crime and Music

2006-10-14T09:03:00.000-07:00

My little family of three moved to Vancouver when I was 11, and I started getting into crime. I shoplifted with an older friend, stole change and other stuff from parked cars, and I even ripped off the local high school, taking a classical guitar. Thus, my life-long passion for music was based on theivery. I learned to play "biker music": The Eagles, Bob Seger, Bob Marley, Deep Purple, and Neil Young et al. The advantage of playing guitar was that when my mom brought home a bunch of bikers, I could stay up late playing them songs until everybody passed out in a drunken stupor, which is perhaps not such an advantage, depending on how you look at it.

Music became my de facto identity. I was not the toughest kid on the block, I was not cool, I couldn't handle my liquor, and I wasn't popular at school like my sister, but I was a musician, and somehow that allowed my mother to accept me as one of her own. She was an incredible singer who never did anything with her talent, probably because of her substance abuse problems. She had lots of offers from bands, agents, and managers, but she refused. Just thinking of her beautiful voice gives me the chills to this day: she carried around twice the pain of Janis Joplin, so you can imagine the soulful quality of her vocals. She sang to us all the time, and music enveloped our lives. Despite our extreme poverty and occasional homelessness, we always had a good stereo with eviction-sized speakers and a huge collection of great albums.

Music has always been a part of my life, and inevitably, music helped me recover from my difficult beginnings. Music and personal growth are intrinsically linked, because music teaches us about dynamics; we listen to music because it changes and flows like a river, and I believe we can apply this progressive mode to our lives. I can look back at what I listened to, and how intently, and I can see a distinct pattern that matched what was happening in my life. To me, music was like a wise old friend with a bunch of interesting stories.

...and crime was that good-for-nothing friend that always made you do stuff you regretted. I got into shoplifting quite a bit and got caught. I remember wailing as the store clerk led me into the back room, not because I thought I was in trouble, but because I realized perhaps for the first time that I was doing something really wrong. Somehow, I had been ripping off stuff without truly coming to grips with the impact. Theft does more to the theif than the victim, I think. My mother didn't do much.. she screamed and threw things, but only for an hour or so, and her opinion was already not very important to me. I was definitely changing, growing more hardened and taking more risks. I got in a few fights, and I started hanging around the skateboard park in East Vancouver. There were some teenaged "gangs" (which in 1982 were not very dangerous) that hung out at "the bowls," and I got to know some of them. Just when it looked like my life would consist of hard drugs, hard crime, and misery, my father stepped into the picture for the first time in my life...

Resource Mandates

2006-10-02T22:45:00.000-07:00

In Victoria BC Canada, we are facing a huge shortage of funding for basic resources. Every social agency I have worked for is over-stretched and under-staffed. I guess fast food joints have the same problem, but saving lives is so much cooler than making burgers, so I'll stick to the social work issue here. It's really hard to maintain the mandate that you started with under these trying circumstances. Here at the local needle exchange, we are feeding, clothing, and damn near bathing clients in our sinks because they simply have nowhere else to go. Perhaps Street Outreach Services (our official name) did not set out to handle these things, but sometimes our ideals do not fit with reality so well.

So homeless shelters have become storage facilities, and soup kitchens have become emergency shelters, and food banks have become crisis management centers. There is a mindset out there that says we should all stick to our mandates, and not enable the government to... hold on, I have to stitch up a gushing chest wound...

...ok, what was I saying? Oh yes, the government is getting off pretty easy here, because there are enough compassionate people in Victoria agencies to hold hands and form a love chain all the way to Khandahar. These loving folks will always go the extra for people who suffer, so they get stretched thinner and thinner.

Perhaps these loving people could learn to have boundaries, but perhaps the whole concept of "mandates" is flawed. Does life operate in neat little categories? Those who work with the street population know that chaos is a part of the game. Of course we need funds, but those are slow in coming... way, way too slow. So what are you going to do? Leave people to suffer? Quit helping altogether? I think we need an action plan for how to deal with limited resources. I think volunteerism is one possible direction, for example. We can lobby the government forever, with little results. We can protest and get really angry, but I'm pretty sure that even most members of the current government feel powerless to stop the swell of economic pragmatism that is dominating the climate right now. So maybe it's time to turn to our fellow community members, and promote the idea of helping for free. Would our energy be better spent that way, I wonder? Of course we can't expect to replace the current workforce with volunteers, but we can ease the burden.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that the government is not responsible for the cash shortage. Government writes up the budget, and therefore should be accountable. But in the meantime, community workers need to come up with a gameplan as we write those letters to our MLA's and MP's. Any thoughts?

I Know Everything!

2006-10-01T19:01:00.000-07:00

I write from the perspective of someone who's "been there," and I notice when I look back at my work that I could be misunderstood if I'm not careful. Let me say this clearly: I do not "know" the homeless. I do not know "what to do" about the problem that faces every city in the world-- the looming clash of cultures. I do not understand the causes, roots, or nature of poverty. Anything I say about what people may or may not be is a gross over-generalization, and I certainly don't have a catch-all solution for anything. That's why I sometimes just tell my story: I figure that when I talk about my personal experiences, I create a piece of the picture, which is better than complete darkness. My dad (you'll find out about him someday) said something that stuck to me:

"Don't believe anything you read and only half of what you see."

He was usually drunk when he said it, and it seems really dumb at a glance, but this little expression launched the critical aspects of my thinking. Let me show how the thought-train goes: If I, who was born into a family of poor alcoholics, homeless, mentally-ill, abusers, and victims, if I, who spent the better part of 5 years suffering in addiction and homelessness myself do not truly comprehend the issues that I and my family experienced, who does?

And when I say that I don't comprehend the issues, I mean that I can't look at somebody who is currently homeless and predict reasonably why they are homeless, or what it will take to get them off the street. I can guess, I can make assumptions, and I can make judgements. I can compare my own life to this person's life in the hope that we share some common threads, but I can't really know what they are going through.

That's why I have little faith in a reporter who is yelling into a microphone from the "frontlines in the war on terror." The fact that he is in the situation means nothing. Even if that reporter gives the microphone to a local, who is more directly impacted by the war, we are still not getting the full picture, though the media would give the illusion that we are.

Let's face it, we would all like to know "what to do," and we would all like to know what is REALLY going on. Some of us are convinced that we understand. I am not one of those people. I think we can only state perceptions, and even the things we claim are "factual" are just facts from one little view. It takes a LOT of these little views strung in a row to get a fuzzy half-picture.

My Story 3: Under the Tree

2006-10-01T07:14:00.000-07:00

I think our life in Calgary must have gotten to my mom somehow, because we left for BC when I was around 10. I remember that just before we left, my sister and I were in the custody of the courts. We had been found drinking, and mom was nowhere nearby, so they placed us in a temporary home for a few days. I don't remember much about it, it was just a generic situation with "parent-like" objects who rushed you through the tasks of your day when they weren't ignoring you.

I suspect that my mom was under investigation around this time, because we packed and left for the BC interior in a jiffy. I think my mother might have sent our belongings ahead of us, because we ended up hitchhiking with a tent and a few sleeping bags. Yes, that's right-- my mom was hitchhiking through BC with two kids. We landed in Kelowna BC late one night, it might have been midnight or something. I was carrying two sleeping bags, and my mother and sister were carrying the tent and backpack. We were walking through a residential area, and I was struggling to keep up with them, being tired and weak from travelling. My mother was in one of those intolerant moods, and she was power-walking ahead of me with my sister. I lost them somehow. It still puzzles me to this day: did she intentional try to ditch me, or was she so oblivious that she lost track of me?

Regardless, I was alone in a strange town, with a couple of sleeping bags. I knew that my mother and sister would have to go downtown to hitchhike out of Kelowna-- I remember them talking about it-- so I found a major road that looked right, and stuck my thumb out. A small pickup screeched to a halt, and the guy behind the wheel asked me where on earth I was going at 1:00 in the morning. I had to ask him which way led to the downtown area, because I simply didn't know. He said he was going to take me to the police station instead, and I was suddenly very afraid. A few minutes down the road we hit a red light, and I made my move. Grabbing my stuff, I jumped out of the truck, saying "thanks for the ride!" and headed for the nearest side street.

He didn't follow me, or disagree with me, or anything. Somehow, I figured out which way led to town, and continued on my way. I arrived downtown, and wandered around for a bit, exhausted from my journey. I found a large conifer tree with really large lower branches, it might have been a spruce. I knew from previous experience that I would be able to sleep under it without being seen, while still being able to see outside of it. Conifers with low hanging branches are perfect sleeping spots for urban campers because of this fact, and also because the ground beneath them is a soft bed of needles.

What I didn't realize, being 10, is that if you light a small fire of kindling under the branches, you will be visible. So I was quite surprised when a security guard lifted back one of the branches and said "What are you doing under there?" I don't remember what I said, but it was something like "I'm just waiting for my mother." Much to my relief, he told me that I would have to put the fire out, and left.

I don't know about you, but the image of a ten-year-old sleeping under a tree with a pathetic little fire is a heartbreaker. I don't understand to this day why that security guard didn't take some action right there. Maybe I was convincing in my lies, or maybe he thought I was a local runaway who would return to my suburban home tommorrow once I got hungry. In any case, I slept there that night, and woke up to find myself on the lawn of city hall! I left the sleeping bags stashed there and proceeded to a large downtown park, on the shore of Lake Okanagan. I met some teenaged girls, and ended up talking to them, because one of them said I looked like her little brother. I somehow in that conversation convinced them that I needed a few dollars, because they gave me a five dollar bill at the end of it. I went to a little restaurant and got a nice steak burger for lunch.

I eventually met up with my family, because Kelowna was really small, and I knew if I hung around town, they would come looking for me. I think my earlier experiences with street life really helped me muster the strength to leave home at 15. It would be an interesting study to see if other street teens have any early experiences of homelessness like mine. Somehow, it seemed really natural to sleep under a tree at the time, though I look now and wonder where I had gotten the courage to hold it together that night.

The Geography of Homelessness

2006-09-23T10:59:00.000-07:00

It would be very hard to live on the streets in Canada now, at least from what I can see here in Victoria. Every nook and crannie of every street downtown has been gated, locked, or is patrolled by security guard companies. It seems that many business owners and municipalities are taking a more active role, cementing up sleeping spots, and using any creative method they can to prevent "undesirables" (what a word) from "polluting" the landscape. It's not surprising. It's easy to understand the perception that street people loitering outside one's storefront has a negative impact on one's business. So if you walk down Douglas street at night, you will see all these subtle and not-so-subtle tactics at play: classical music blasting out of speakers at MacDonalds, security guards whipping by in sophisticated vehicles--no doubt equipped with technology that rivals the local police department-- and the police moving people along. It's a frustrating situtation, and it seems to be growing larger somehow. Does the problem seem larger because of a larger street population? Cuts to social programs? Yes, and no. Partly, the problem is larger because of the gates and security technologies being employed.

Think about it for a second: Back in the 1980's, a street sleeper could sneak into a back alleyway, curl up beside a garbage can, and nobody would be the wiser, except maybe the guy who takes the garbage out in the morning. The homeless were very hidden. I know, I was one of them. I could sleep in the corner of a parkade, or curl up behind the bushes at the local city hall. I could sleep on a random rooftop undisturbed for the whole night. Today, those options are gone. The homeless are woken up and moved on several times in a night, which leads to a crisis of sleep deprivation in a lot of cases. As the system gets better at locating and policing possible sleeping spots, people are left with no options. Take a look at this story from Fresno:

http://www.fresnobee.com/local/story/12648847p-13351272c.html

The story parallels our situation in Victoria: People being shuffled from one location to another, with not enough social resources to draw on. Every city in North America has been dealing with "tent cities," and forced evictions from "unsafe sleeping environments." People are running out of places to go. Check out the story below about the tent city in Toronto:

http://www.tdrc.net/tc-hardll.htm

Ironically, as the homeless get pushed out of more "secret" environments, they are becoming more visible to business owners, to the public, and to the media. As awareness of the homeless plight increases, the need for shelter is being made obvious. Because people are being forced to fall asleep on busy sidewalks during broad daylight out of exaustion, the problem is right in front of us. This may be frustrating for those who are trying to "get rid" of the homeless, because the current strategy has merely sharpened the pencil on the issue. In Victoria, meetings are being held every week with city officials, police, social workers, and business owners to come up with fast solutions.

We need to be as creative with housing solutions as we are with loitering deterrents. The street population is incredibly diverse, and the housing solutions need to match this diversity. We need to keep the dialogue going. I will not say that pushing street people out into the public eye is a positive thing, in fact I think it's degrading and humiliating, but I think we in the helping industry should use this new visibility to highlight the need for affordable and comfortable housing.

My story 2: The Substance of Substances

2006-09-17T19:13:00.000-07:00

My memory is a little fuzzy the farther back I go, but I think the first substance abuse I was involved with was sniffing cooking PAM. I was in Calgary at the time, and we used to hang out with the local native kids, taking whatever we could find. I was about 9, my sister was near 12, and we got blasted a lot. We were lucky—many kids died from sniffing Pam around this time. I remember getting drunk a lot too. Because mom was out drinking most nights, we were free to wander Calgary’s neighbourhoods. I remember one time we were drinking on the roof of this elementary school, and we crashed out—one of my first nights on the streets, I suppose. I awoke to a bunch of kids my own age yelling up at me from the playground. They seemed so small and immature below me. I felt old somehow, hungover and sick. My older sister had disappeared and there was a teacher in the gathering crowd, which forced me to make a quick exit by sliding down a lamppost on the far side of the roof. I vomited about 10 times on the short walk home.

Getting drunk was not exactly acceptable in my small family. If my mother had known I was drinking, I might have gotten a smack. However, there were lots of opportunities to sneak beers at her parties, and if she was drunk enough, she might have even offered me a drink or two. She used to say “Boogie till ya puke!” which was her way of saying I would learn the dangers of drinking through practice. I think it’s probably unnecessary to say this strategy of hers didn’t work very well: she was simply too ill to be raising kids I’m afraid.

So I drank, and got sick, and drank and got sick. My uncle gave me an ounce of weed for my 12th Christmas, which introduced me to a new drug that didn’t make me vomit. At that point in my life I didn‘t make a very good substance abuser—I got wasted on too few beers, and I was afraid of harder drugs, at least until I hit 15. Come to think of it, I never wanted to do anything. I liked mental clarity, and I always regretted getting stupid on the stuff. It was all I knew, however, so I kept at it, hoping I would someday be able to handle my liquor like my mother and sister. My whole family coped with stress by using substances. My aunts, uncles, mother, father, sister-- everybody. I would later learn that the difference between us and the rest of the world was our poor level of functioning.

I hope that you can see my purpose here when I share these seemingly morbid stories from my interesting past. I want to convince you readers that as dismal as it seems, a positive outcome is always possible. This story ends happy, on some level. I did all the wrong things and still turned out to be a more than just a survivor. The key for me was to see my own good intentions, and to accept the good intentions of those who were trying to help me.

More of my story to follow some other time.

More On Bureaucracy

2006-09-12T18:59:00.000-07:00

I have been writing and thinking a little about systems and how they are difficult to navigate for homeless people, but I think I may have understated the problem. Imagine this scenario: You are homeless, facing a few criminal charges, do not have any ID, and are without any income, let alone a bank account. Your teeth are rotting, and you don't have a high school education or a bank account (or money to put in it).

Just think of all the wonderful 1-800 numbers and front desks of government agencies you would have the pleasure of using! Do you think you could deal with all these agencies in a few days? How about if you had a month? How long would it take you? Seems like a tax audit on crack, doesn't it?

The reality is, a lot of people would just get overwhelmed and look for a fast solution-- it's human nature. That's why no-questions-asked resources work so well with the homeless. The least amount of paperwork, the better. Of course we always need to keep our minds on the future, so some of these more complex needs should be gradually addressed, or we are just band-aiding the situation.

ID is a big start, and it feels really good for the street person to have a reasonable identity. You also need ID to apply for social assistance, open a bank account, and pretty much everything else, so why not start there? I remember feeling a glimmer of hope when I finally got a set of legitimate ID. An advocate might be useful at this juncture. To get ID in Canada, I had to provide my mother's information, my father's information (much more difficult), and then come up with the cash to apply. That got me a birth certificate, which is useless as ID, but it can lead to more. A social insurance card was next, and then I was eligible for "BC ID," which is a picture ID that substitutes for the driver's license in this province.

Just one of these bureaucratic tasks per week can be exhausting, so we have to be patient with people coming off the street. I've heard the term "street-entrenched" used before, and I think it's a good word to describe the scenario that a lot of people face. Ironically, it's a form of institutionalization, because people with no legitimacy are forced to live day to day at soup kitchens and emergency shelters. You could almost call it "anti-institutionalization," because it's the avoiding of institutions that leads to this form of powerlessness.

As systems grow more complex and difficult to navigate, we can expect that getting off the street will become harder and harder. I see many people giving up and accepting their lot now, overwhelmed with a combination of system complexity and shortage of resources. The new breed of social worker will have to be very creative to deal with this new reality...

Tips for getting off the street...

2006-09-09T17:32:00.000-07:00

I thought I would share some advice for those trying to get off the street or out of extreme poverty. 16 years later, I am not looking back, and these basic ideas have helped shape my new life. Feel free to pass them on:

1) Start where you're at. Yes, some people are in better shape than you, are healthier, richer, or seemingly happier, but comparison is your enemy right now. Just focus on the next step in front of you.

2) Use everything as a possible resource. Every piece of food you eat is energy that can be used to get you to the next appointment, for example. See everything as an opportunity to get ahead.

3) If you are really involved in the street community, consider dropping out of it for a while. The only way out of your situation is to look after yourself for now. If you want to help others, you have to get your feet on solid ground-- it's way more effective.

4) Be honest, come clean, and hold nothing back from those who want to help you. The truth can't hurt you if you are in control of it.

5) Be humble. If you are leaving the street and entering a new part of society, you have to show respect for that new culture. Yes, you have street smarts, but they won't help you with the bank teller or the university clerk.

6) Be patient with buracracy. NOBODY likes paperwork, and it is not a conspiracy against you, it is just a side-effect of a huge population. Roll with it, and breathe deeply when you fill out the application form for the 4th time :)

7) Expect some setbacks. You will get your stuff ripped off, get kicked out of apartments, get rejected by people, fall in love, get hurt, and lose your shirt many times. You can let this stuff bother you, but only for a little while... giving up won't make it go away-- life is full of struggle no matter which way you go.

8) Use your creativity. Street life teaches you how to improvise, which is a HUGE skill. You won't understand how important this skill is until you get a few notches up, and then people will be pounding down your door for fresh ideas. If you get stuck, be resourceful. You have it in you.

9) Keep in your heart the thing that inspires you. Maybe it's your musical talent, your kids, or your dog. Honour that part of you, and use the strength that it lends you.

10) Communicate communicate communicate. Tell people when you've had it. Tell them when you are happy about a new job. Find someone and tell them, even if it seems trivial. You are worth it.

11) Believe in people. That includes you.

Participatory Action Research

2006-08-20T16:43:00.000-07:00

How do you survey, or get more information from homeless people to help them, while respecting their life and what they are going through? It is a huge question. Tons of homeless "counts" and surveys have been carried out in almost every city in North America, and the question of how to do a respectful study is still looming. I am currently consulting with a local non-profit (Victoria Cool-Aid S'ociety) in doing the second Homeless Count, now called the "Homeless Needs Survey. The first few steps have been to gather the various local agencies and discuss what the motives and methodology will be for this project. Overwhelmingly, everybody in the room at these meetings has a desire for some concrete action about the problem wrapped into the survey.

That brings me to "PAR," or Participatory Action Research, a method of studying a social problem WHILE taking action, involving and empowering the clients through the process. PAR happens in a spiral fashion, actions taken are analyzed, and a new action is formulated through collaboration with the community in focus, while the social challenge (hopefully) gradually shows steady improvement.

That's probably a gross generalization and over-simplification of PAR, but it seems pretty cool. One of our staff on the Homeless Needs Survey project suggested we use this method, and I'm interested. I am particularily interested in how we will involve the homeless in this survey, and I also like the idea that the survey itself can be a form of compassionate action. Our last homeless count had a "rough count" portion, where volunteers (about 150) went out to find people sleeping rough, and interviewed those who were willing. The volunteers carried a packback full of goodies... food, drinks, and medical supplies. It was, in essence, a massive one-day street outreach.

Look, if we want to get numbers and crunch them for grants or to justify the work we do as social agencies, the least we can do is provide a helping hand in that moment, a form of direct compassionate action. Another part I like about it is the opportunity for people to meet street folks in a different context, a situation where both parties can learn more about each other. It's a very concrete and simple way to bridge the cultural gap between society and the street.

Agency workers also brought up the issue of people being given the chance to "tell their story." I remember reading an article in a local paper where a homeless person said "you can find a bowl of soup or a sweater, but try getting somebody to listen to you for 5 minutes..." This is such a true statement. As we get the wording down for the survey, I hope we have some open ended questions on there like "What got you here?" As well, I want people to have some time to spend during the survey. Telling one's story is a very important part o the healing journey. If we still need stats and numbers, we can get them from a qualitative analysis of the stories, but during the survey, we can still provide a listening ear.

Well, the whole project is still being developed. I will say that we have a lot more of the social work community involved this time, and the ideas have been nothing short of revolutionary. More to follow at some point...

For more information on PAR, try these links below:

http://www.phac-aspc.gc.ca/publicat/cdic-mcc/18-1/a_e.html

http://www.sanpad.org.za/RCI/Dr%20Nadine%20Petersen/Kelly%20article%20-%20PAR%202006.pdf#search=%22%22participatory%20action%20research%22%20homeless%22

Me and The Needle Exchange

2006-08-12T17:30:00.000-07:00

I just started working at the local needle exchange, and I am very relieved to see that my perceptions are still in tact after a week or so. I, like most people, feel uncomfortable around intervenous drug users, and I may have crossed the street to avoid more than one in the past.

My relief comes from how darned normal they seem. My imagination has played tricks with me, telling me that needle addicts had "lost their souls," or had become "subhuman." I have been in a lot of nasty places, but I have never spent much time with this group of people, and hence, my position has perhaps come from ignorance. In reality, they couldn't be any more passionate, more funny, or more insightful. The conversations have been great so far, and I would say that the violence level has been about one tenth of what you would find at a local pub. Not bad for a group of people I had written off. But that's why I took this job.

Moral Development

2006-05-26T10:46:00.000-07:00

I found another "formerly homeless" blog today. It is written by a 27 year old guy in Australia who has been on the streets since the age of six:

http://www.homeless.org.au/gish/

My thoughts about human intent have been a great catalyst for personal change. I believe in the "general goodness" of the human heart. I can't zero in on when this idea occurred to me, but it has been a very strong and seemingly permanent belief of mine. I'm not alone in thinking that every human has a basic good intention at heart-- it has been called "Moral Development." Now, I'm not a philosophy scholar, so I won't give you a reading list, but I will say that faith in human intent could be argued as one of the building blocks of society. If you want an expanded description of Moral Development complete with big words and tricky sentences, try this link:

http://www.iep.utm.edu/m/moraldev.htm

To link this idea to my personal changes, let me begin with the premise:

"Everybody is doing the best they can to help others at every single point in their life."

I know, it seems a little extreme when I put it like that. After all, when we are hanging out on the beach, thinking about sex or sunshine, how can we say that we are helping anybody but ourselves? Furthermore, there have been several historical figures who have seemingly convinced us that human evil is not only possible, but common. I offer no proof that humans are incapable of evil, and many examples that people have given me in debates about this idea have seemed daunting. Nevertheless, I believe. I see the possibility that when we are seemingly self-indulgent, we could be resting on the beach to cope with the difficulties of helping people all day long. This "coping" could be part of some cycle of tension and release: Help and back off, help and back off. I look at all the atrocities that have been carried out by cult leaders, dictators, and sociopaths, and I can honestly see how these people could create a Machiavellian excuse for their actions. I think on a very deep level that a seemingly-evil dictator who has attempted genocide believes that more lives will be saved or enhanced by his/her actions (hmmmm... female dictators... hmmm...um... oh nevermind). Like I said, I can't prove humans are good, I just believe it.

Now, if you take this basic belief and apply it to a person facing extreme poverty, abuse, and/or homelessness, it's easy to see how having a positive view of humanity is helpful. Because I believe in general good intent, I can forgive my mother, I can understand the people who passed me by on the street corner, and I can feel positive about my future. This is not to say that I haven't had doubts, or felt disillusioned by people (we certainly do some stupid shit sometimes). I think the key is to have an overall positive outlook, and look for a benevolent reason why people cause harm to others. It seems to me that my life is more "on track" when I am enamored with humankind. At the lowest points in my life on the street, I was bitter and angry with "all the fools of the world," and even more angry with myself.

Self-doubt and doubt of humanity are intrinsically tied together. Those who are the most critical of humans have to include themselves in the mix, unfortunately. Ironically, people who espouse that humans have "evil" or "sinful" nature are making the point for the purpose of teaching others it seems, which is quite a contradiction(I see teaching as a benevolent action). I think we all move through phases of doubt and pessimism, but even at those moments, we are still trying to teach, and help others. For me it is just so much easier to admit that I love people, and accept my inner Barney.

Perhaps my positive slant is merely a coping mechanism. Perhaps all the pain I went through makes me wish that the world was better than it is, and I have deluded myself to cope with reality. As far as I can see, the origin of my belief doesn't really matter. Good gets done, and the question of why becomes less and less important.

The best counselors and helpers that I have talked to have always tried to focus on my good intentions, to help me see that I was of value. I remember one session in particular that shifted my thinking, and propelled me into action. I was ranting about how middle-class North America was so materialistic and greedy. The therapist that I was seeing asked me about my own values, and then asked "If you became rich, would you suddenly become selfish and greedy as well?" That question sat with me for a long time, and I finally came to the realization that "middle-classers" were probably not much different than me, they just had more money. By focusing on my good values, the counselor gently led me to understand that people are simply doing the best they can. They are sometimes misled, or caught up in circumstances, but they are not greedy by nature. I try to emulate this helping style when I can, because I believe that positive human intent--more importantly the awareness of it--is the key to unlocking the door of personal growth.

"Man's nature is not essentially evil. Brute nature has been known to yield to the influence of love. You must never despair of human nature."

GHANDI

Systemic Homelessness

2006-05-06T07:43:00.000-07:00

People have a natural fascination with the causes of homelessness. Nearly every pamphlet, poster, website, or policy document on homelessness takes a stab at why people become or remain homeless. Addiction, mental illness, and poverty are often blamed, along with child abuse, financial disaster, and negligent government poilicies. Every street person has their own reasons, and their own opinions about what causes homelessness, so it is not very helpful to paint the whole picture in one sweeping stroke of generalizations. While not pinning the whole thing on one donkey, I want to talk about what I will call "systemic homelessness."

Now, I am not a policy specialist; perhaps somebody has already used the term "systemic homelessness" in some other context. If so, just substitute it with something like "System-Induced Homelessness."(It's VERY important to invent your own jargon whenever you can). What I am talking about are the various social, cultural, and financial systems that we have slowly built over the centuries, and how they create "cracks" that vulnerable people can fall into. For example, a currency system prevents homeless people from aquiring food without money-- if you have no money, the system says "no soup for you." If you choose to ignore this system, you will find yourself facing the criminal justice system. We have "fashion systems" that dictate what clothes you should wear to a job interview, and cultural systems that tell us what things we should say to a prospective employer. In the movie "Trading Places," Dan Aykroyd finds himself systematically locked out of his life step by step. At the end of his journey to absolute poverty, he can't even get his hands on a razor. Every step of the way, he encounters a different system which denies him of his basic needs.

Now, I've defined a few systems above, but the systematic approach is so natural to modern society that we forget how pervasive it is. Let me give you an example: Let's say a tradesman named Fredrick lives in say, Kelowna BC, and he wants to move to Vancouver. He gets a construction contract in Vancouver, and proceeds to pack up his belongings, shipping them to a storage facility in Vancouver. He is waiting for payment from a previous contract, so he is short on cash. Fredrick expects that his bank will clear a cheque he deposited by next Monday, so he catches a greyhound bus, figuring he will stay at a youth hostel for a day or two. When he arrives, he finds every hotel, motel, and hostel that he can afford is booked. In desperation, he calls a homeless shelter, and is told that he can come over and register for the night at 8pm. When he arrives at the shelter, he is told that registration actually happens at 5pm-- the fellow who told him to come at 8pm was a new employee, and was misinformed. Fredrick is now completely homeless, at least temporarily. Ironically, the system utilized by the homeless shelter (e.g. the training system for new employees, the registration system) has been the final blow. I'm not going to analyze this story and list all the systems involved, but you can see that there are a lot of hoops for Fredrick to jump through.

Now imagine Fredrick has a mental illness, or substance addiction. Perhaps he has an issue with anger. If he breaks the window at the registration booth out of frustration, he will be carted away by the poilce and assigned a criminal record, which will make him less employable. You can easily see how systemic problems can accumulate for anybody with personal challenges. I have always had a low tolerance for application forms and clumsy systems, but when I was on the street, this dislike for systems left me paralyzed and unable to function at times. In fact, I would say I was afraid of systems, maybe because of my gypsy-like childhood. I will generalize here and say that many on the street feel the same way-- they can't deal with "the system." They are angry, frustrated, and often unable or unwilling to keep up with the complexity of modern society. Here in British Columbia, the simple process of applying for emergency social assistance has become a month long process of "pre-application screening," with plenty of application forms and paperwork to fill in. I imagine more than a few street folks just throw their hands up and do without rather than go through this crazy paperwork dance.

Hence, the really helpful street resources in my opinion are offered unconditionally, with "no questions asked." I realize that it is getting harder to offer things this way. Most community resources like soup kitchens and shelters need funding, and therefore they need to keep tallies, and provide accountability data. Liability and legal issues cause a lot of complexity as well. I guess what I am saying is that social help needs to strive for the goal of simplicity for the client. If a shelter can't be flexible enough to deal with the chaotic and non-systematic lifestyles of the street community, then the shelter needs to re-evaluate its mandate, and recommit to the goal of meeting clients where they are at. At one time, I was on the street in Calgary, and I slept at this shelter that was essentially a big room with a bunch of thin mats on the floor. You didn't have to be sober, on time, or registered to sleep there. You came in, the staff showed you your mat, and you slept--That was it. While that may seem pretty basic, it was incredibly effective, both as harm reduction, and as a launching pad for life changes. You could actually hold a basic job while staying in this shelter, because you didn't have to worry about where you were going to sleep once you got off work. I can't remember, but I think they gave you a bag lunch in the morning too. A simple plan with a simple outcome. I think these kinds of simple resources are essential as part of a community plan for dealing with homelessness. I'm not sure that every community would be willing to have places like this, however. For those who sleep on memory foam or a nice Serta every night, the idea of a mat on the floor is perhaps too brutal, but I'll tell you, it beats sleeping in a parkade because the only local shelter has only 20 or so beds. I say we should diversify our efforts to acknowledge the diversity of needs on the street. Flexibility is the key to dismantling systemic homelessness.

Homelessness and Religion

2006-05-05T13:04:00.000-07:00

Most street people have an interesting relationship with the world's religions, because they are constantly being offered help and counsel from the local chapters of every temple imaginable. Furthermore, the homeless have a lot of issues that most religions try to answer:

"Who are we?"
"Why am I suffering so much?"
"Doesn't anybody care?"

While everybody asks these questions, the crisis of homelessness perhaps cranks up the heat a little. It's interesting how being in basic survival mode every day can still leave you enough room to be philosophical and spiritual. A lot of social workers and street outreach people would say that basic needs should be a priority; funds should go primarily to blankets, food, shelter, etc. While I agree that raw resources are important, I think the philosophical/spiritual needs are also significant, and the functional approach ignores them. Plain old secular pragmaticism is not enough, it seems.

I have shifted my opinion on religion quite a few times. At one point, I was a born-again Christian, living on the street, and trying to get all my friends to join the church. At another point, I was practicing Buddhist meditation. At other times, I was spewing atheist rhetoric about churches exploiting homeless people, and taking a Marxist "Opiate of the masses" stance on things.

At this point, I don't care where it comes from, I want people to help in whatever capacity they can. They can pick their own reasons for helping. The problem is so massive and threatening, that I find little space for my judgments about why a particular person is involved. I like the compassionate attitude that religious people try to demonstrate, and I know from my own religious experiences that they are doing what they think is right. I also believe that though each belief system has components that I may or may not agree with, they all have universal themes of compassion, humility, and courage that directly address the spiritual needs of the street person in crisis. Religion also makes a great substitute for client-centered counseling, which sadly doesn't get funded very often.

Similarly, I couldn't care less if a politician funds a new housing project because of a looming election. Most who work on the ground in homelessness solutions would be happy to take the funds. To me, it doesn't matter why you do it, and it doesn't even matter what need you are addressing, spiritual or functional. I just want you to get out there and show them you are thinking about them in some small way. The most important message that you could have sent me when I was homeless was that you noticed me. The other details are not as important as you think they are.

My Story 1

2006-05-03T07:34:00.000-07:00

I was looking over my previous posts, and I realized that I haven't said much about my past. I want to take some time to tell you part of my story now:

I was born into a single parent family, consisting of my Mother, my older half-sister, and me. My sister's father was a deadbeat alcoholic, and my father was a deadbeat alcoholic, so my mother took care of us with the assistance of what was then called "welfare." She was a hardcore biker lady, who frequented the worst pubs and bars. I'm talking about those places that always have grand names like "The King Edward," or the "Royal York," but smell like a bathroom, inside and out. These places always had the two doors: one for "gentlemen," and one for "ladies and escorts," a product of a long-gone era. My sister and I were the two stringy-haired kids sitting on the curb outside these holes, waiting for our mother inside. Though the image of kids waiting for their parents outside a bar would shock the modern world, back in the seventies it was somehow more acceptable. Besides, we kids knew how to make up good stories for anybody who asked us what we were doing.

My mother was "cool," in fact, she was beyond cool. She had curly black hair down to her waist, leather "bitch boots," and the finest quality leather biker jacket. She could walk into a bar she had never been in before, sit down with the a bunch of bikers, and say "What the fuck are you looking at? Buy me a beer!" She always brought home the most interesting characters: guitar players, warlocks, psychics, and poets-- all of them wearing black leather jackets. I'll talk about her life a bit more later, but it will suffice to say she was not ready to be a parent.

My sister Sherri, being nearly 3 years older, filled the gap my mother left by looking after me a lot. She was a gorgeous girl. Every school we went to immediately placed her in the number one popularity spot. Not only was she one of the best-looking girls, she was always taller, more developed, and stronger than her peers. I've read some literature about girls in poverty hitting puberty faster, and I believe it-- Sherri looked like a woman at 13. She bailed me out of more conflicts with bullies than I can count, and at certain points, I could terrorize bullies by merely mentioning her name. Sherri always knew what to do. We went hungry a lot, and she would borrow money from her richer school friends, or sneak food out of their houses. She was like any typical kid raising a kid, though: I didn't have a set bedtime, or chores. I didn't even have to brush my teeth. Sherri was my best friend, and we spent hours being just plain silly and talking about what we were going to do when we got out of this mess.

We moved a LOT. I remember going to more than 25 different elementary schools. I'm sure there were more than 25, but my memories are just a big, fuzzy mess of teachers and bits of curriculum. Of course I never finished a grade legitimately, and the schools that we attended just placed Sherri and I in the grades that we were supposed to be in, according to our ages. I don't remember my teachers from elementary at all... not a one. I can't even put a rough sketch of a face to any of them. They passed through my life like the river of social workers and cops that surrounded my family.

I'll bet you're wondering how my mother kept the courts and the system at bay, since our migration patterns were obviously damaging and one would think that my sister and I would have been placed in care after the 10th move. My mother was a master of deception, flying beneath the radar by changing welfare workers, and making up stories to every new one. She was terrified at the prospect of us kids being taken away, and she made damn sure we knew how to lie to the cops and the social workers as soon as we learned how to speak. Mostly, she hid us from the system by moving every few months, which I guess stumped the Canadian government agencies. She probably couldn't have done the same today, but I'm sure that there are a few kids that slipping through the cracks for different reasons.

So my early childhood was a blur of nomadic slum living, dotted with some really damaging neglectful behaviour on the part of my mother, and held together by my strong older sister. There is so much more, but right now I feel I have said enough...

Derek

Involving Healthy People

2006-05-02T13:08:00.000-07:00

I have a problem with the gurus of the world, that is, the folks who reach a level of understanding that drives them to climb the nearest mountain and stay up there meditating for the rest of their lives. I am talking about the people who live healthy and enlightened lives, and remove themselves from those who are unhealthy. We live in a society that stresses the importance of "choosing the right people" to associate with. While I agree that we have to remove ourselves from negativity at times, I am frustrated and saddened when I see the lost souls who have exhausted all resources, and can't even get another human to talk with them for 5 minutes. All the gurus on all the mountains could be leaders, but they choose to quietly smile at the suffering world. While I admire this quality of non-attachment, and I have even strived to attain it at times, part of me still thinks we have to keep our feet in the world. Buddhists have, for example, the concept of the "bodhisattva," the person who can attain enlightenment, but will not enter nirvana by choice; he/she longs to teach others and help those who do not understand. The bodhisattva stays in the world to help others. To me, this is the ultimate in compassion. Christians also have a similar concept in "spreading the gospel." I'm sure all spiritual movements have some mention of the enlightened soul who is devoted to helping others after enlightenment. It makes sense, doesn't it? Who will teach if all the learners leave upon completion of their lessons?

Statistically speaking, if you take a random sample of 100 people in Canada, maybe 10 or 20 people will need a great deal of emotional support and resources (I'm really just guesssing here). Some of these people may have never been taught basic life skills. Maybe 10 or 20 of these people will be gifted, happy, blessed souls, and the rest are somewhere in between. It simply makes sense for the healthier folks to be supportive to the less fortunate. I think for the most part, really well-developed people help out the community... a lot of them volunteer, donate, and teach where they can. Yet there is an idea out there that nothing can be done about the suffering of humans, and that the wisest choice is an a-political, passive, and removed position on the more controversial parts of our society. Furthermore, many of the people who are "half-healthy" (if I can use this silly term) are either trying to "remove themselves from negativity," or do not believe that they are "ready" enough to help.

So you have a hundred people who are all separated from each other, when they could be digging in and connecting. On the street, people have learned to find counsellors and teachers within their own communities: one street person will emotionally support another. When I lived on the street, I saw all the roles of society carried out on a miniature level; there were "counsellors," and "preachers," "political activists," and "educators." Because the rest of society has exiled the street community, it makes do in whatever way it can. Unfortunately, the advice you receive is a little warped. "Counselling sessions" can be done over a bottle wine, and political activism might involve smashing the window of a government office(not incredibly effective). In many cases, it was just the blind leading the blind. There were a few genuine helpers who were not in crisis themselves, but they were so overwhelmed with the great need around them that they couldn't spend much time with their street clients.

We need the gurus to get off their yoga mats and befriend some struggling people, really. To me, it's part of the spiritual journey. We also need some of those average folks to admit that they are ready enough to help in some small way. Forget donating, go out and spend five minutes with somebody you would normal filter out of your life. We're all connected, so in a way, that's YOU sitting on the sidewalk needing help, and you are about to walk by and pretend you didn't see yourself.

Forgiving Yourself

2006-02-28T07:58:00.000-08:00

The ironic thing is, when you have a history of causing harm to yourself or others, the negative judgments you throw on yourself only compound the problem. Somehow, we have to move beyond merely critizising past actions, and wipe the slate clean. Such is the human condition: though we think that punishing ourselves will help us "smarten up," the real path to change is to admit and accept our faults. You see in my posts that I have a forgiving approach to human mistakes. I think, for example, that it is quite normal to find certain homeless people annoying, even as a social worker. In fact, until you acknowledge that you find other's behaviour frustrating, you are simply lying to yourself, and perpetuating the cycle. A recent study showed that people lie on average 3 times in a ten minute conversation. Is that ok? I think it has to be ok, if you are planning on getting more honest. People who make bad life choices are ruthless to themselves. They have no problem describing their mistakes in great detail. Sometimes, even those who want to help them will assist them in this destructive self-debasement. I call it the "kid-at-the-back-of-the-class" syndrome: If you feel like the "bad one," you perpetuate that role, and you try to be the best "bad kid" you can be. Furthermore, the teacher expects little of you, and there appears to be no way out.

Of course, the healing begins when we realize that everybody has spent their time at the back of the class in one form or another. We can't erase the facts, but we can forgive ourselves. I am writing this because I am personally struggling with some things I want to change. I still have a lot of judgments about people I help, and my judgments are interfering with my effectiveness. I am being helpful, but I think I can do just a little bit more by giving myself a break about being judgmental. We do the best we can with what we have.

Derek